Staring at this white space, waiting for the flood of emotions to come, to take life form, once I open the dam. I've been feeling a lot of differnt things over the past few days, saddness and disappointment mingled with hope and acceptance. I am not sure which has taken precedence... so, right now, in this moment, I am mainly feeling blessed.
Blessed to have myself, for I have grown in comfort and acceptance of myself as I am. Reminding myself not to settle nor become too laxadaisacal however, as growth is not born out of stagnation. Still, a since of being at home within my own skin, an acceptance of who I was in the past, who I am in this very moment, and who I am forever evolving into tomorrow.
I have known for sometime that I would have to get to this place... place of peace from within before I would be able to be a good partner to anyone. Perhaps why things never could get totally "right" between me and the ladies in my past. Now I feel comfortable and confident in exploring new relationship, as I now feel that I am totally present and able to extend myself to another.
I know this might not happen today nor tomorrow... still the possibility is now open, and patience has come along for the journey. Patience and Openness have finally made the long awaited appearance, and I feel good, really good about that.
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